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Paperback Publisher: Harvest House Publishers 101 Probing Questions...101 Compassionate and Scriptural Answers from Focus on the Family’s Mike Haley Almost daily we hear news reports that confirm the acceptance of homosexuality in our culture. Homosexuals are adopting children, appearing as characters on television programs, taking vacations catering to an exclusively gay clientele, and even seeking the right to “marry” their partners. But is this acceptance healthy for society? Few topics can raise so many questions so quickly. And for many readers, those questions hit close to home as they learn of the homosexuality of a loved one or close friend. Here are the answers to the most often asked questions about homosexuality, fielded by an expert on the subject...and a former homosexual himself.
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| Great Book |
| Customer Rating: 5 out of 5 |
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This is a great book. It gives a ton of great knowledge and insight. It has questions and answers that can apply to just about anybody.
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| No sweet coating |
| Customer Rating: 5 out of 5 |
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I found the book honest, direct and respectful of the reader who really just wants the facts from someone who knows what he's talking about, and actually walks the talk. I enjoyed the practical suggestions to family members, based on what he and his family went through.
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| Wonderful Insight!! |
| Customer Rating: 5 out of 5 |
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Mike has the ability to answer questions about this social topic with frankness and clear understanding not only from his point of view from being in that lifestyle, but also from the point of view biblically.
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| If you want to ignore all the sociological data... |
| Customer Rating: 1 out of 5 |
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While no one has yet proven where homosexuality comes from (just as no one has proven where heterosexuality comes from) the normal approach for a reference book such as this would be to study the facts and data and THEN form an opinion as did the American Psychological Association when they declassified homosexuality as a disorder back in the 1970's. This is one of those books that is based around a particular conservative religious view and then plays with all the facts in order to prove the authors thesis.
Homosexuality is and always will be a minority orientation but (like being left handed) that doesn't make it in and of itself wrong. This book is motivated by the so called ex-gay movement where men are supposedly "cured" of their nasty little habit by the grace of god. The fact that most relapse back into a gay lifestyle appears to be no matter to the ideologically minded authors of books like this. And neither does the fact that many of these men are nominally bisexuals and simply repress the gay side of their identity in order to be acceptable to themselves (something that most psychologists will accept as an option for some men). On the other hand NO psychologist out there worth his or her salt will sanction this sort of belief that the millions of gay/bisexual people in the world are some sort of cosmic mistake in need of change. Nope.
The book Is it a Choice? Answers to the Most Frequently Asked Questions About Gay Men and Lesbians by Eric Marcus was published back in the 1980's and has been available in updated editions ever since, including a Spanish language translation titled ¿Se elige? 300 Preguntas y respuestas sobre la homosexualidad. That book is based on facts and does address religious aspects of this issue in an evenhanded way. The fact is that every major religious group with the exception of Islam has significant gay-positive material out there. Love is love and a gift from god not to be tampered with by sanctimonious, small minded fundamentalists.
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| Objective, informative, and enlightening. |
| Customer Rating: 5 out of 5 |
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I am deeply concerned about this issue, but though I feel strongly about my beliefs, I myself have never struggled with these tendencies; and though I will always condemn the action, I cannot fairly judge those who struggle. I accept the Bible, but I have only recently begun studying it, and I haven't gotten to the "gay" part yet; my belief about homosexual behavior stems from natural law, and is supported and reaffirmed by my Catholic faith.
What Haley's book did for me (well, doing; I haven't finished it yet) is give me informed answers from someone who actually knows what he's talking about. He addresses so many of the questions I have had, and I feel more equiped to approach the issue with more compassion, and appreciation, for those who struggle with homosexual tendencies. Although the Catholic Church itself understands that homosexual tendencies are not always (if ever) the fault of the individual, many members of the Church have yet to be educated, and as a result they often approach the issue with cruelty. Even if you don't agree with Haley's book, he gives those on our side the tools to approach the issue with compassion and understanding, and teaches us that cruelty is never effective, much less Christian behavior.
Moreover, the book, like my views, is a combination of natural law and the Bible, so it is effective even to those who do not accept Christianity.
Another very interesting comment he makes is in regard to the defeminization of women in our society (I highly recommend Wendy Shalit's book "Return to Modesty;" it changed my life). There was a time when I was subconsciously conflicted about the naturalness of sex; the Church teaches us that sex is natural, but society takes that a step further, saying that because it is natural we should give into it more frequently. After reading Shalit's book, I realized that I felt conflicted, not because my faith was constricting my sexuality, but because I was, subconsciously, giving into the modern idea, and that was causing an internal conflict because of its unnaturalness. Haley's reaffirmation of this idea impressed me, and further clarified the reason why a child might develop homosexual tendencies. I truly believe that this defeminization of women has caused the gentleman to all but disapear, respect for the weaknesses and strengths of the opposite sex to diminish, and we are looked down upon for having womanly (and manly) strengths; in an effort to provide an identity for all, our society has taken our identity away from us.
My only critique of this book (and I may change my mind on this after further reading) was his comment regarding how boys are different because they like to play in the dirt, whereas girls don't. Actually, I was constantly dirty as a child.:) However, what he is ultimately getting at is correct, in that, boys and girls are different.
To the individual who addressed concern regarding his advice to "pray that he feels pain," or something to that effect. No one wants to inflict pain on their child, which is why some parents do not address the issue at all. However, pain is part of healing in everyday life. One of the horrors of cancer is that pain is often not felt until it is too late. Parents of children who are born without pain receptors pray for their children to one day feel pain. The liberation of honesty can mute pain for a while, but only temporarily. Having a place where you are accepted, regardless of your behavior, also makes it difficult to face your pain; this is true in all cases, for all types of struggles.
I was pleasently suprised by the usefullness of this book. If you disagree with his beliefs, at least be mindful that he is helping us be more understanding and compassionate in an age of hate.
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