It is hard to be optimistic about an incurable disease, but the author of this supportive resource, a writer who has had H.I.V. for 25 years, manages to do it. "Now that I'm healthy," he writes, "I'm far more worried about getting in a car accident on the Los Angeles Freeway than I am about getting sick from H.I.V."

Mr. Grodeck, an online editor for the RAND Corporation, guides readers through the first seven days after diagnosis, the next three weeks, and the rest of the year.

Combining the human element with essential information about treatment options, choosing the right doctors, the importance of diet and exercise, holistic alternatives and sex, the book transforms a complex disease into one that can be understood and managed.

In his discussion of treatment options, Mr. Grodeck takes a level-headed approach.

While noting that the new generation of medicines, taken together in various combinations, can slow or even halt the virus, he cautions that so-called alternative therapies do not improve the course of H.I.V. and that some are dangerous and can make the infection worse.

"If you like gambling," he writes, "you'll love herbal medicine. Most herbal or plant-based medicines haven't been properly tested, so they are risky." Moreover, he says, people taking prescription drugs should "be careful about taking herbs and supplements."

Dr. Dan Berger, a columnist for Positively Aware (see "The Buzz"), contributed greatly to the book and wrote the foreword. In addition to medical issues, the book covers topics such as disclosure, depression and where to go if you've been discriminated against.